As-Salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatahu, This is not something I usually write about and I much prefer sharing my opinion on most issues with my sisters and close friends - but I felt compelled to share my thoughts on this one! The Real Sex Lives of Muslim Women When I first saw this article floating on my timeline, my first instinct was...
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Salaam!
I just wanted to formally introduce to this shared journal that me and my 7 year old share...
I know some moms are already doing it because I got the idea from a blog, but unfortunately I can't remember the name of it to link it here. (Sorry!)
We use this journal you write back and forth to eachother. It's so much fun and a great way for her to express herself when she can't use words. Of course, like every mom, I would want my daughter (or son!) to tell me every single thing, but in reality it doesn't always happen.
Sometimes, we as parents can be harsh or strict (guilty) or hold our kids to these ridiculously high expectations that leave no room or excuse for them to err. And believe it or not, these kids pick up on it without us even saying anything to them. This makes them apprehensive about coming to us about things, even if they aren't such a big deal because they are expecting a bomb. So they do exactly what anyone in a crisis situation would do: panic or run! That's something we as parents have to work on and fix in sha Allah. This is not OK.
But then there are the other times when it is our kids' personalities and natural disposition that makes them less likely to speak up and ask directly about certain issues! It may very well be that our kids are naturally shy and reserved. My daughter fits into this category very well, but if she's comfortable around you she'll talk your head off.... Seriously. Sometimes, she's shy about asking some things, but I think enjoys the fact that this is something secret and personal, only shared between us.
Another perk of using this that I have found personally beneficial is that I can take my time to think of a response to a complex question especially as it relates to socio-political and religious issues. Alhamdulillah, those questions don't come up too often in the journal, because she would ask me right there and then.
So what do we write about?
Most of the time she writes short stories, recount any dreams she may have had, ask me to do something or remind me to do something and we sometimes work through any little bickering she may have with my youngest siblings! They are close, so naturally they bicker a lot as well! Haha! When I write to her, I would say positive things to motivate her and help her to look at things from another perspective.
Starting up is easy! All you need is a notebook or cute journal if you don't mind putting out the extra coin. I personally recommend a cute notebook or journal because it may encourage them to want to write in it.
Alhamdulillah, this has been such a great way for us to stay connected on that deeper level, so I really hope we can continue this way into her teen years and beyond in sha Allah!
Let me know if you've ever used a shared journal with your kids in the comments below. I would also love to hear what other strategies or activities you use to connect with your kids in sha Allah.
Looking forward to connecting with you all soon!
Salaam!
I just wanted to formally introduce to this shared journal that me and my 7 year old share...
I know some moms are already doing it because I got the idea from a blog, but unfortunately I can't remember the name of it to link it here. (Sorry!)
We use this journal you write back and forth to eachother. It's so much fun and a great way for her to express herself when she can't use words. Of course, like every mom, I would want my daughter (or son!) to tell me every single thing, but in reality it doesn't always happen.
Sometimes, we as parents can be harsh or strict (guilty) or hold our kids to these ridiculously high expectations that leave no room or excuse for them to err. And believe it or not, these kids pick up on it without us even saying anything to them. This makes them apprehensive about coming to us about things, even if they aren't such a big deal because they are expecting a bomb. So they do exactly what anyone in a crisis situation would do: panic or run! That's something we as parents have to work on and fix in sha Allah. This is not OK.
But then there are the other times when it is our kids' personalities and natural disposition that makes them less likely to speak up and ask directly about certain issues! It may very well be that our kids are naturally shy and reserved. My daughter fits into this category very well, but if she's comfortable around you she'll talk your head off.... Seriously. Sometimes, she's shy about asking some things, but I think enjoys the fact that this is something secret and personal, only shared between us.
Another perk of using this that I have found personally beneficial is that I can take my time to think of a response to a complex question especially as it relates to socio-political and religious issues. Alhamdulillah, those questions don't come up too often in the journal, because she would ask me right there and then.
So what do we write about?
Most of the time she writes short stories, recount any dreams she may have had, ask me to do something or remind me to do something and we sometimes work through any little bickering she may have with my youngest siblings! They are close, so naturally they bicker a lot as well! Haha! When I write to her, I would say positive things to motivate her and help her to look at things from another perspective.
Starting up is easy! All you need is a notebook or cute journal if you don't mind putting out the extra coin. I personally recommend a cute notebook or journal because it may encourage them to want to write in it.
Alhamdulillah, this has been such a great way for us to stay connected on that deeper level, so I really hope we can continue this way into her teen years and beyond in sha Allah!
Let me know if you've ever used a shared journal with your kids in the comments below. I would also love to hear what other strategies or activities you use to connect with your kids in sha Allah.
Looking forward to connecting with you all soon!
